Funny Observations From My Life As A Single Mom: 20 Times You Became Brutally Aware That Some Self-Care is Needed ASAP!

1. When you realize that if you ever decided to go for a jog (stop laughing, it may happen) that your leg hairs may cause a friction fire.  

2. When you realize that your last actual pedicure was when that "Jenny From The Block" song was popular AF. 

3. When you realize that your last bath was a 15 minute soak to remove the filth of the day and that you used bubble gum bubble bath and had to try not to accidentally goose yourself with a naked Barbie. 

4. When you realize that the last time you went to Yoga you were A. flexible and B. didn't pee a little bit when you attempt Dolphin Pose. 

5. When you realize you've had a gummy bear stuck in your messy bun (BTW, Mom's invented this look with NO credit from Pinterest.) 

6. When you realize your eyebrows are either reminiscent of tow caterpillars mating on your face or you've just gone full Whoopie Goldberg and just don't care to draw them bitches on anymore.  Either way...it's just bad news.  

7. When you realize that your daily meditation is "Please don't punch that bitch who cut me off in the pick-line..." 

8. When you realize Pinterest is your only real mental break in the day...but it's 3AM and you're still pinning projects you'll never do.  

9. When you realize your wardrobe went from "Hey, look at me. I'm the hot party girl." to "Hey, Please ignore me and if you do speak to me don't expect me to be happy about it."

10. When you realize the last date you went on was with yourself and even you disappointed you on the date.  

11. When you realize you once had some bras what made you say "Oh damn, I feel sexy" and now all of your bras just make you say "Please just don't let a tit fall out when I bend over to pick up the groceries." 

12. When you realize that you're well past the point of no return...leggings are just now the only "pants" you own.  

13. When you realize you've been driving around ALONE and singing the Moana soundtrack as loud as you possibly can.  Remember when you had good taste in music? Nope, not any more.  

14.  When you realize that the days of lingerie, thongs, and sexy thigh highs have been replaced by big, beige, control-top type situations that cover you from Boob to Kankle. 

15. When you realize that your last girls night out ended in an epic conversation with your Uber driver about that time your kids had explosive diarrhea.  

16. When you realize the last time you had a good cry was at the end of the movie Coco.

17. When you realize you the last meal you made just for yourself was a bowl of cereal and a vodka tonic.  

18. When you realize the last book you read was What to Expect When You're Expecting...and it was a book of LIES, so now you have trust issues.   

19. When you realize the last time you saw a therapist was on the show Intervention. 

20. When you realize the last selfish thing that you've done is get a Pap-Smear. 

 

Funny Observations From My Life As A Single Mom: The 'What Ever Happened To...' Edition

 

1. What ever happened to children's birthday parties that weren't out of control? Remember birthday parties as a kid? They consisted of 6 or 7 of your best buddies, maybe a cousin or two, a cake, some paper hats.  Well, not anymore. Now we have elaborate soirees where we invite 40 kids AND THEIR PARENTS (because no one just drops their kid off anymore, like our parents did) cupcake towers that would put your wedding cakes to shame, and truckloads of gifts that we know our kids don't need (or deserve, because...when is that last time they picked up their own room?)  

2. What ever happened to "be home when the street lights come on" parenting? We don't live in that type of world anymore. Kids used to be able to get together with friends and explore the world around them. Remember The Goonies or Stand By Me? Yeah, no.  That shit would never happen nowadays. Instead, we have to helicopter parent and monitor every moment because the streets are filled with crazies making even the best of neighborhoods feel unsafe and thereby creating a culture of over stressed parents and overly uptight kids. 

3. Whatever happened to quality toys? Every toy I buy is a piece of crap.  It falls apart or is flimsily made and sometimes barely even makes it home before its broken, creating meltdown after meltdown.  Dear toy makers, you suck. 

4. What ever happened to kids having the time to play after school? I've heard horror stories from countless parents about hours of homework...starting in kindergarten.  Not gonna lie, this freaks me out.  I'm terrified of having to confine my child to the house for additional school work instead of letting him run around the backyard getting exercise and releasing the pent up energy he already has before eating a good dinner and going to bed at a decent hour.  How are you parents surviving this?? 

5. What ever happened to just packing a school lunch? We all know how difficult the rules have become.  (No, I am not saying that I don't respect the fact that allergies are real and dangerous.) But damn, packing lunch sucks now.  Old school parents just threw in some bologna sandwiches, Cheetos, and some Snapple. 

6. What ever happened to parenting while quietly judging everyone else, instead of putting it all over the internet? Remember the days of your parents and your friend's parents sitting around (possibly while smoking and drinking cocktails at 4:30pm) and talking shit about other parents? That stayed in the inner circle.  It was never splashed all over Facebook or brought to everyones attention in a group text.  

7. What ever happened to customer service? Remember when you could give a person money in return for goods or services and DIDN'T have to go through an automated phone service or were required to go online? Gone are the days of just buying some shit...now we have to deal with the website first.  I don't get it.  

8. Whatever happened to making friends? Now we just friend request each other or follow each other instead of actually hanging out and doing stuff.  

9. What ever happened to babysitters who were the teenage daughter of a family friend or a college girl that lived down the street? They were the coolest, got paid twenty bucks for the whole night and barely supervised anything because they were on the phone the whole time talking to friends.  I learned SO much from my babysitters.  How to get my bangs to stay up like a huge wave coming off my forehead, who the Thompson Twins were, how to call a boy...the important stuff.  I'm pretty sure my babysitters had no real child care experience, no CPR certification, no background checks and absolutely no ability to make sound decisions on nutrition. 

10. Whatever happened to walking? It was never a big deal to walk to the store, or walk around the mall or walk all over the Disney World when I was little.  Now, kids avoid this walking thing like the plague.  I've seen kids in strollers that look like they're graduating from high school any moment now. 

Truth Bomb: How I Sometimes Suck At Life, And I'm Learning to Be OK with It

I am going to just go ahead and say it...  I suck at life sometimes. Of course I could list the personal failures in my life, such as: a tanked marriage, train wreck relationships, career goals taken a backseat to being a mother, collapsed fitness goals... I have failed at it all and yet, here I am, still standing, still trying and still handling it all day by day. 

Being a parent means failing at something daily.  We don't like to admit it, but I am just putting it all out there.  I fail at parenting ALL THE TIME.  Burned the cookies, washed a red sock with the white laundry, packed the wrong stuff in the school bag, missed the bus...any of that sound familiar? Some days are better than others and some days are epic failures that take it all to another level.  I have tried so hard for years to look and act like I have it all together. Most of my friends would look at me and say I can handle anything, but I can't.  I mess up all the time.  It isn't because I don't try. I do. I try really hard to have it all organized...except when I don't have it all organized and it all falls to shit.  Being a single parent and having my son go between two houses means trying to balance it all and make it look easy.  It's not.  Most of the time I feel like one of those circus acts that spins those plates on the sticks and makes them all balance in the air...and then they fall and crash to the floor, breaking into a million pieces.  I have the calendar, group texts, e-mails, newsletters, note from the teachers, Daddy's schedule, Step Mom's schedule, Grandma's schedule, a house to keep organized, a business and dreams I attempt to keep going, a dog to keep from neglecting and some fish that I'm surprised haven't ended up in a toilet funeral, making sure kiddos things gets from one house to the other and making sure that everyone is some version of happy all the time.  

Are we over scheduled? NO! We don't do after school activities or extracurriculars.  If we did I think I would feel like he wasn't getting enough family time between the two houses.  So, there's fail number one.  He isn't playing sports or going to piano lessons or learning Mandarin any time soon.  Another fail? We barely ever make it to birthdays or playdates.  All these parties are on the weekends.  The weekends are difficult. I don't think people really understand that on the weekends we are doing our best to get time with the kiddo that is solely ours and uninterrupted.   Is it selfish that we don't go to every single birthday party we are invited to? Yes. I want my time with him and I want his Dad to have time with him to be able to do the things we enjoy. Is it a complete fail on my part to make more time to do the parties and the playdate stuff? Yes.  I am probably depriving him of having a full and active social life, but he's 4 and he has his whole life for that.  These are the fails that we have chosen and as a family decided to NOT prescribe to the idea that we have to do everything that everyone else's family does all the time.  Some fails are completely accidental and inevitable given the nature of our two-household-parenitng lifestyle. I have read an e-mail wrong, or missed a room meeting, or find an invitation lost in the SPAM folder or stuck to the back of a school project I have discarded into the pile of random drawing and workbook pages. No big deal, right? NO!! When this type of fail happens, the involuntary screw up, it devastates me.  I don't know why.  It's not like I missed anything so important in his life that he would be changed forever.  It's the little things.  But the little things are what kills me the most.  It's those times when I just pull over into the parking lot and cry into my hands and think, "How am I supposed to do this for the rest of my life? I am awful at this.  Why can't I just get it together?!" It's in those moments when I feel alone and overwhelmed and incompetent.  Let me just say this:  I am not alone.  I have help.  I am competent. That being said, the loneliness and inadequate feelings still linger there in my head and in my heart.  It's just a fact.  The reality of trying to keep it together for everyone all the time is that when I screw up, I feel it to my core. It's like a punch to the gut or a swift kick to the crotch.  

Most of the time the guilt of failure is not because I am disappointed in myself, but in the fact that I don't want to let down everyone else who is counting on me. I am supposed to be the one who leads this family. I am supposed to be the one to be the HBIC, the captain, the ringleader and the lady boss.  When it all goes wrong, I blame myself.  It can be a very difficult place to dig myself out of sometimes, but it's reality.  Confession: A lot of us are just deceiving the world when we put out this filtered, picture perfect image, when we know it's very rarely ever picture perfect. The difference is that I am learning to be OK with being the hot mess express sometimes.   

I'm learning to be OK with sucking at life sometimes.  I'm honest about it.  I tell the people around me when I am feeling like a complete screw up.  I am not the only mother on the planet that feels like a dipshit sometimes. I don't have to be perfect.  I don't need to have it all together, or to even pretend like I know what it looks like to have it all together. I am learning that the mistakes that I make and being fallible is lesson I want my son to learn. Perfection is not real.  I want him to be honest and be accepting of his greatness, as well as his faults. I know, I know...Its a process. We don't all just wakeup one day and say "F#%$ it! This is me, world!"

Real talk: I struggle with accepting myself everyday, but I have also learned to forgive myself.  Without that forgiveness the weight of trying to be everything to everyone all the time would swallow me whole.  Embracing who we are as complex people with likes and dislikes, skills and deficiencies, moments of superhero-like grandeur and times of absolutely soul-crushing embarrassment makes life a lot more interesting than the faux filtered Instagram worthy ideal of perfect we set ourselves up to believe in.  

Truth Bomb: Modern Framily and How we Make It Work

"You all get along?" -Everyone all the time

"You go on vacations together? And how does that work?"- Everyone on social media

Trust me when I tell you that I have heard my fair share of comments and seen plenty of awkward facial expressions when I describe the close relationship I have with my son's father and step-mom.  Let me just preface this all by saying, we get it.  It's weird.  Most relationships that end don't end well.  If you have a child together that just adds some fuel to the fire.  Here's a fun little twist...lets add another adult into the mix.  It's only natural to be a bit put off by all of the gross niceness that my family displays, but honestly its other people's preconceived notations that make it weird.  We live in a society where we just expect one another to be assholes and bicker and fight to the tenth degree over every little thing. We satirize it, we make movies and sitcoms about it, but that isn't REALITY.  

As a child of divorce, I can honestly tell you that it takes a lot of calculated choices to raise kids in a co-parenting situation. My parents fought over everything.  Money, birthdays, holidays, weekends, relationships....EVERYTHING. Every momentous moment in my life held tremendous amount of anxiety and stress for me because I was afraid of how my parents would react to being in the same room with one another.  Hollywood movie magic makes that shit look funny, but when you're 11 and your parents get into a screaming argument at camp in front of everyone it can make you seriously question any and all parties sanity. It also makes you question whether or not actually HAVING moments in life where family would come together is worth it.  I think it led me to be the kind of person that never really wanted to be in the spotlight and never have attention drawn to me. Inevitably they would all the in the same room to see me and it would end in some sort of verbal altercation of epic proportions.  

In our framily, we have chosen the path less followed.  It doesn't come easy.  We ARE exes for a reason, people!  Duh.  BUT, we also have a lot invested in each other's happiness, health and wellbeing...OUR child.  Oh, yeah.  That's right.  Theres a kid involved. I think sometimes adults fail to remember that it isn't about US its about the CHILDREN.  Sometimes when I try to communicate with people about raising my son in a blended family they can't seem to realize that the end goal is to raise a well-adjusted person who feels a close connection with all of the people who love him in this world.  As his mother, I would like to provide him with the best opportunity to be a good, kind and decent MAN.  That is why he has a close bond with his father.  That is why I have embraced his step-mother as another advocate and confidant that provide a shoulder to cry on and a perspective in life to learn from.  I mean, how many times have you sat around and thought..."gee, too many people love me." NEVER.  So why wouldn't I want my son to feel endless and boundless joy and love from people who actually care how he functions in the world?  Seems like a simple answer to me, we all want our children to feel loved.  

Beyond all of the obvious, there's another component to this whole situation that I feel like people have a hard time seeing.  We call ourselves the Modern FRAMILY.  That's to say that we are not only family but we are also FRIENDS.  We genuinely care for, respect and LIKE one another.  Has this always been the case? Sometimes, yes.  Sometimes, no.  We have been through it.  My son's father and I have been to the darkest of places and back together. To be honest, there has been pain and resentment.  There has been anger and frustration, fear and fury.  It took a lot of time and communication and CHANGE to get back into the light.  We both had to make CHOICES to change and we both had to resolve to put the past where it belongs and move forward for our child.  I am not saying it's easy.  I am not saying it's possible for everyone to accomplish even a tenth of the progress we have made.  I'm not saying that how we function as a family works for everyone, in every situation, but it can be a goal.  Often I catch myself imagining what it would be like to live in all of that drama, chaos and bitterness that my parents lived in and I think about how awful that would be.  Granted, their situation was different than ours.  Every story has two sides and the truth, after all.  Doesn't mean I want to repeat that life for myself or my son.  It means I learn from what the past presented me and grow forward.  We all need to play the hand of cards we are dealt.  Even if you're holding a shitty hand, put your game face on and just think about the moves you need to make to allow your child to come out ahead.  If you're willing to double down on happiness than my suggestion is to find a way to make the relationships in your life work.   

Real talk: As single parents, both us feel pretty good about the amount of free time we get, or our abilities to live balanced lives without complete burnout.  We get nights to go out, time to go to concerts, time to pursue goals and dream and careers and all without feeling alone.  We support each other and in that support, foster an environment where we can all spend time together and TRULY enjoy it.  Fun Fact: My son's Step-Mom and I often make time to go to dinner with my son or have a girls night out just the two of us. Theres a few reasons we make the choice to do this: One, we actually like each other, so thats cool.  It's nice to feel like we have our own friendship and connection outside of my ex. Two, it allows for my son to see a united front between all of us and shows him that I trust her, and therefore, so should he.  That's important because I want him to feel like she is there to disclose his emotions so that she, too, can be there to work through the hard times and the happy times when his Dad and I can't physically be there.  Like I said, you can't have too much love.  And three, my life is a lot easier knowing that I have someone to advocate to my ex for ME sometimes too.  Although we are very close, he is also him and I am also me.  She knows us both and knows how to talk to her partner in ways I just don't or can't  or sometime just won't, because we aren't a sitcom or a movie...we are real people with real emotions and real reactions to life sometimes and we all have our supreme dickhead moments...even me (or should I say, especially me? I don't know...don't answer that one.) 

I only have a few tips on how we made it happen and maybe they can help you, too:

1. Get over yourself.  YOUR issues are yours. You have to work those out.  Go to therapy  Talk it out. Find the root causes of your struggles and make the CHOICE to make your life better.  It frees up your heart to be more open to a fuller family dynamic.  

2. Talk to each other.  Don't text.  Sit down and talk to the co-parent and step parent.  Set boundaries.  Set expectations.  Allow them to express their anxieties.  Actually HEAR them and allow them to HEAR you.  Words are important but so is actually seeing someones facial expressions and body language.  You can often pick up more than you realize.  We do a monthly "parents only dinner." A lot gets discussed.  A lot of plans get formulated and a lot of resolutions are made during these dinners. We also laugh a lot and trade ridiculous stories of parenting, so that's a bonus.  

3. Make this core group of you and your child or children the top priority.  These are your people.  Holidays, birthdays, special occasions...these are the people that will be there with you and these are the people you should make the sole focus of these moments.  If you guys are cool, everyone else will follow suit.  

Yes, we do school events together.  Yes, we take the time to go to dinner alone and just as parents to catch up on what is going on with our son.  Yes, we try to go on little vacations and outings together.  Yes, sometimes it's just me and the step-momma. And YES, we all get along.  No, we aren't weird.  No, we aren't perfect.  Its hard work to parent.  It's hard work to co-parent.  But it's an easy decision to choose to create a family (or FRAMILY) for the betterment of our child. 

Funny Observations From My Life As A Single Mom: The Bathroom Edition

1. How is it possible we spend 75% of parenting most concerned with who is pooping, peeing, where they are pooping or peeing or cleaning said poop and pee...yet, Moms can literally forget to do either for what seems like days?

2. I didn't think it was possible, but I have witnessed my son pee ON an ENTIRE ROLL of toilet paper, without ever removing it from the holder, just to amuse himself.  

3. Theres nothing better for ones confidence than stepping out of the shower and having a tiny person say "I hope I never look like that naked." 

4. Kids give ZERO F*#%S about privacy until its an adult who is requesting said privacy...even in public bathrooms.  

5. Bathroom stalls are for quick pee breaks.  Family bathrooms are for your four and a half year old who insists on taking off all of his clothes and his shoes to take a poop.  

6. Asking a child to "not make a mess" while they are in the bath tub is like asking a pyromaniac to hold your lighter fluid and zippo.  

7. Never squeeze the bath toy thats been unused for a bit, in fact burn it, because if whatever is inside gets out you may need hazmat.  

8. I found out that I could still do the splits the other day...not that I wanted to but I slipped in the tub and now I'm not sure anything about my body will ever be the same again.  

9. I've been thinking about toilet training my terrier.  She seems like she would catch on faster than the kid did, and she probably wouldn't ask me to wipe her ass in the middle of my first cup of coffee.  

10. When you finally have some time alone at home and you go to relax in the tub but you need to first remove 45 tiny animals, a Chewbacca, maybe 1 or 2 naked Barbies, wash the from the tub crayons and glittery bath bomb the kiddos used a few days ago...aaaannnndd now this is just cleaning and not relaxing so you give up.  

Birthday Truth Bomb: 37 to Zero and My Decision to Stop Living My Life By The Numbers

Today is my birthday.  I'm Turing 37.  It's not a monumental birthday for most people, but it is for me.   Today I am owning up to something I have been thinking about for a LONG time and deciding not to live my life by the numbers anymore.  So, I am 37. What the hell does that even mean? Am I supposed to feel old? Am I supposed to feel fulfilled and contented to be 'middle aged?' I don't feel that way at all.  In fact I feel like my age is reversing! It's taken me 37 years to self actualize on some serious shit and today I feel like sharing it with all of you.  

I am happier than I was when I was 27.  That was the year I got married.  A horrible decision to try to hold on to an idea of what I thought a twenty-something was 'supposed to do.' Take it from me.  Don't let age dictate your actions.  Trust your gut. One divorce later and I can say I am much more appreciative of myself and who I am.  Now, that I really think about it 17 wasn't even that "happy."  Who is happy in high school? It's awful. I was awkward, and nerdy, and didn't fit in anywhere.  I was so ready to leave my small town to get away from all of the things I thought were holding me back and weighing me down that I just rushed through those teenage years.  I so desperately just wanted to be an adult. Now that I am an 'actual adult' things haven't really changed...mentally still feel 17! Dance in my underwear to TLC and think back on days when I was thinner, less wrinkled, unsure, unaware of my own power and I thank the universe I have had so many years to discover that all of that wonderful inside of me has always been there.  Always.  

I am single...as in "table for one please" and "one-ticket-to-the-latest-horrible- rom-com-'cause-I-don't-have-anyone-to-worry-about-complaining-through-the-whole-movie" single.  Sounds nice, right? Yeah.  It's ok for a while, but its been 4 years and I am still alone and I am starting to think I may be stuck like this, but I have to keep reminding myself that it took 10 years in miserable relationships to get to the point where I began to put myself first.  No rush.  Putting my own needs at the top of the priority list is what's most important these days.  

So here I am, looking in the mirror and this is what I see: 

I am 37, a size 16, run 5 miles 4 days a week, gave birth to 1 kid 4 years ago after 22 hours of labor. Now I am a single mom with some extra weight on her frame but can bench 115 pounds.  I have spent 20 years hiding in a 1 piece bathing suit and eating 1200 calories a day, less than 20 grams of carbs a day, to try to fit into a image that just isn't attainable because as much as I try I can barely get that number on the scale below 190.  I'm over it.  I am ready to be free of the numbers.  I feel young, I feel healthy, I feel motivated, and I feel grateful. Some places on my body may jiggle when I walk or dance and I may have a wrinkle or two when I smile, but I am finally smiling. I may eat a carb or have an actual meal and not feel guilty. I may have fewer friends but the ones I have are quality individuals who have helped carry me through 17 years of strife and struggle. And I may be flying solo on date nights, but I am worthy.  Worthy of happiness, of love, of kindness, of compliments, and of feeling as beautiful inside and out than anyone else.   For the first time in my life I can put on a 2 piece bathing suit, lift my hands to the sky and say "This is me! I am 37 and giving ZERO Fucks!"

Let's Be Friends: What Not To Say To A Single Parent

Parenting is parenting, plain and simple.  It really doesn't matter if someone is single or married.  I am a person, a well-educated woman with many interests and a multitude of passions and talents.  One of those many things is being the best mother that I can possibly be. But I also love music and art, films and books.  I love to see my friends and talk about world issues or just crack jokes back and forth for a few hours over some food and a nice glass of Pinot Grigio.  I am a whole person. Look, I really want to like you and I don't want you to sound like a complete dickhead.  Here are some tips on what not to say to a single parent.  Then, maybe we can see each other's perspective a little better and we won't have those cavernous awkward moments that can fill a room when someone said something stupid or offensive.

  1. "How do you do it all?  I wouldn't be able to do it." Yes, you would.  Any of us would.  You love your kid; you take care of your kid.  That's it.  Like Tina Belcher says, " I'm no hero, I put my bra on one boob at a time just like everyone else."
  2. Please address me as a person.  Ask me how I am doing.  Yes, I know, you want to know how my child is doing, too, and that’s great.  I really do appreciate it.  Ask me how I am doing.  It's not very often that someone will actually care how or what I have going on outside of parenting, but can you just pretend?  The list is long and I kind of really want to talk about all of that stuff.  As much as I would love to talk about potty training, preschool germs, sleepless nights and temperamental toddler tantrums…give me a break.  Just ask me how I am doing.
  3. "I can relate." No, you can't.  Just like I can't relate to your issues.  I don't live in your house. I don't know what you're going through, so please don't assume you can relate to all the shit I have going on.  It's a delicate balancing act of emotions and circumstances, at any minute it could all crumble.  You can't relate to my situation, just like I can't relate to yours.  But I can empathize and I can lend an ear or a shoulder to cry on if you need it and if you offer the same, that would be greatly appreciated.
  4. "You should start dating again." Thanks for the opinion, but I'm really good alone right now.  When the time is right, it will happen.  Dating isn't a fix to single parenthood.  I don't want to fix it.  This is working for me, so please keep your opinion on my love life, or serious lack-there-of, to yourself.
  5. Back off of the ex.  It's none of your business.  If you aren't in my very, very tiny circle of trust, please keep any and all opinions of the ex to yourself.  Don't make drama where drama doesn't need to be or exist.  We don't have time for that mess.  Move along.
  6. I can't stand the terms "baby daddy" or "baby mama." We have names and identities.  At the very least you can call me "Boo's Mom." Its disrespectful to address either of us in such a fashion and I mentally check-out when it happens…so more than likely I have probably ignored all the words that came out of your mouth after "baby mama."
  7. "Make sure to take care of yourself first." Yeah, I get it.  The reality is that when you are a single parent taking care of yourself has to take a back seat to taking care of the kid, the house, the dog, feeding the fish, making dinner, running baths, doing your own laundry, etc.  Sometimes I just can't take care of myself first.  I forget to eat, or shower, or take my vitamins or apply my wrinkle creams, but I try to take care of myself the best I can and I don't need a reminder of priorities.  Mine are straight.  Thanks.
  8. "I bet you really need a vacation right now." This may be difficult for you to understand, but the minute you are away from your tiny terror you miss them and the thought of being away from them for too long makes every bone in your body ache with a pain that is so indescribable you often just opt for a weekend at Disney World rather than a spa weekend away with your girls.  There is no vacation from this life.  And I don't need one.  I love the chaos and crazy.
  9. Don't give me parenting advice unless I ask for it.  Just don't.
  10. "I feel so sorry for you." Really? How rude! Why would anyone feel sorry for me? I have an incredible life, an amazing child, a warm home, a full heart and the best and most amazing support system in the world.  Never feel sorry for me.  I got this.

It takes a village to raise every child and every village is different.  I chose this life and I don't regret it.  My child is loved beyond measure by both of his parents, all of his grandparents, and aunts and uncles, cousins, babysitter, neighbors, friends, and teachers.  Are some days harder and longer than others? YES! This can be said for all parents, not just singles parents.  Please don't presume to assume that I'm alone or lonely, or sad and pathetic. I am not…and even when I am feeling that way.  I'm not.  So lets be friends, shall we?

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