1. Yoga Pants. Even though you aren't a yogi and you haven't seen the inside of a gym in 3 years, yoga pants are literally the staple of your wardrobe. Who has time for actual outfits? 2. Lip Balm. Because when was the last time you actually wore makeup? At least lip balm makes you feel like you're trying. Am I right?
3. Hair Ties. Notice I didn't say brush, flat-iron, or hair spray. NOPE. You know you just pull that mop-top up and go. It's all good, we all do.
4. A gigantic coffee mug with a witty quote. None of us would survive without coffee...why not remind yourself you once had a sense of humor, too?
5. Hand Sanitizer. Not so much for your children, but for you. Kids are gross and bring home weird germs from school and you're trying desperately to have some ability to fight off whatever infectious disease is being spread at the playground.
6. A purse that is way bigger than you would actually need if you had no children. Before kids you could leave the house with a stylish little wallet sized cross body...now you carry a suitcase size messenger bag that is probably giving you some sort of serious skeletomuscular injury.
7. A pocket full of used tissues/wipes. Your child is a walking, talking mucus faucet or slobbery mess or (for some reason unbeknownst to you) has constantly stick hands and face.
8. A wine opener...no explanation needed. Call it a survival tool.
9. Snacks. You even bring snacks to a restaurant because your child will inevitably change his/her mind post ordering process and decide that they don't want to eat anything the waiter brings.
10. A full DVR and a music playlist with songs that have curse words. As soon as you are alone you're bumpin' gangster rap and watching KUWTK. It's your guilty pleasure and you indulge when you can...which isn't often enough.