Every time I pull into the preschool parking lot images of the movie Mad Max flood through my brain. I totally understand that people are in a rush or whatever but when we are dropping our kids off at school let's try to act like we've been somewhere before, am I right?Here's why driving in the school parking lot is killing me:
1. Why the hell are you looking at your phone and "driving" and in a parking lot filled with people? If you haven't noticed, you happen to be driving like a hive of bees has been let loose in your minivan! Whatever it is you're doing on that thing can wait.
2. Children are darting everywhere....hold on to them! I know it's hard to hold onto a toddler, push a stroller, balance the 47 items you have to bring into the school and look at your phone (again with the damn phone) but seriously I have had legit 3 mini heart attacks recently because I have seen a toddler running out in front of cars in the parking lot or behind a car that has its reverse lights on and it's rolling backward. I really can't handle being that terror-striven at 9 in the morning.
3. Everyone drives a tank. I get it, we have kids...BUT learn to park said tank into a regular parking space allotted without parking 4 inches from my passenger side. It seems like as soon as I pull into my space and put my car into park a tank pulls in next to me, leaving no room to get my kid out of the car. Ummm...OK, I am annoyed AF but not wanting to be the "rage mom" I try to pull my kid out from the drivers side...while a tank is waiting and has had the brass cojones to beep at me letting me know their trying to pull in to the available space on my driver's side. I'm trying people, you're leaving me literally no room to function.
4. You either can't follow the crossing guards directions or you don't care, but I saw three cars last week drive as if no one was helping other kids across the street. Don't be an ass. They're doing their job, now you do yours and drive like a decent human binge, please.
5. Your standing behind my car while chatting it up, lattes in hand, ready for the gym, and casually discussing your child's gluten-free-no-theme-themed-birth-anniversary party...or some other goofy shit. Please move. We're new here and I'm trying to not make a bad impression so when I ask you to move (in the politest voice I possibly have) please don't roll your eyes and judge me...
I'm usually sweating bullets when I leave the parking lot most mornings. I am totally convinced that preschool parking lots are the most terrifying places on earth. Way worse than the Wal-Mart parking lot, for sure.
What do you think?